Grieving is an individual’s innate reaction to loss. Grief is the anguish you feel when you lose something that or someone who is an essential part of your life.

Several instances of grieving for the loss of someone or something are as follows:

- you have split up with someone - you were sacked from your job - loss of the opportunity to pursue a dream - you learn that a person very close to you is dying from a deadly illness - you are discovered to have a fatal illness - you and your spouse are getting a divorce - you destroyed the trust of your best friend - a pet passes away - a person you love passed away

All these examples can lead us to grieve. Nevertheless, of all the scenarios given, it is the death of a loved one, such as a partner, a son or daughter, or a parent, that gives so much sorrow. Nothing of this world can remove the void that their death causes.

These special people may have been everything in our lives. And our lives would never be the same again without them. We feel the anguish of having someone we love taken away from us. Nevertheless, to be able to move on once again, we have to undergo the grieving process and later pick up the fragments of our lives.

There are no set instructions in grieving. When we grieve, we have to choose the healthy ways of airing out the pain that we experience.

Grieving does not mean wailing or crying your heart out each time you remember what you have lost. Crying is not the only sign that we are mourning the loss of a loved one. One can seem stoic on the outside yet is breaking up from the pain of loss within.

Grieving does not have a set duration, such as the “recommended” duration of just 1 year. The length of the grieving process will be different for one person compared with another. No one can hasten and instantly “get over” the grieving process. Time mends all pains and anguish.

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Often, it is never easy to quickly accept the demise of a beloved. It is impossible for anything to replace the void left behind by a loved one who has passed away.

Nevertheless, time passes even if your loved one is gone; sooner or later, you must gather up the fragments of your life and start anew. You try to handle the sorrow that you no longer have that special someone to share your life with.

A person who has lost someone very special to him or her have the tendency be fully overwhelmed with sorrow. One of the ways to face the sorrow caused by this loss is to take action. Taking action allows the grieving person to remember the life of the departed and celebrate and appreciate it.

To celebrate a departed loved one’s life with a memorial is one act that permits you to confront your own sorrow. Giving honor to the dead is part of almost all cultures in the world even during olden times. It offers those who are sorrowing a seed of solace, support and comfort.

Some of the most common commemoration tributes to deceased loved ones are the gravestones we place on the graves of those who passed away; a musical score or a piece of art may also be offered up to the departed loved one; or you and those close to you could get together and just recall the life of the one who passed away, crying and laughing as you remember the life of the one who passed away.

Dealing with the grief brought about by the loss of a beloved is a very personal matter. As such, you should permit yourself time to process the loss that you experienced. If you are artistically inclined, painting, writing poems or prose, or creating your own music during this process could help you deal with the grief about the death of a beloved.

At this delicate period in your life, it is also a good thing to be with family and friends who can offer you support as you deal with your bereavement and sadness.

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Arrangements and organising services linked to funerals are normally left in charge of undertakers, who are also known as funeral directors. To achieve success in this profession the person performing these duties should possess certain essential and unique skills and qualities.

An undertaker must be energetic and be ready to work beyond normal schedule, as he has to be on call 24 hours a day. He must be prepared to spend most of his time outside because of the nature of the job.

An undertaker must be an excellent communicator and a patient listener. People from various cultures, sects and ethnicities as well as those of any age will have to be handled with aplomb by him. He must be compassionate and must understand others’ feelings. However, he should be emotionally strong and not get carried away by other people’s grief, so that he can offer psychological support to others.

As an undertaker, an individual should project a dignified and serene personality, while taking care that his disposition doesn’t heighten the sorrow of the bereaved family members and friends.

Knowledge of different religious customs, rituals and beliefs and profound respect for these greatly helps undertakers in succeeding in their profession. They must be conscious of various customs and rituals followed by various groups during the funeral ceremony.

A good undertaker will essentially possess good organizational skills and managerial abilities. He must also have leadership skills and should be able to coordinate with a large number of people - from the clergy members to the local florist.

As the undertaker will be in charge of obtaining all clearances and following all regulations with respect to the ceremony, he will have to thoroughly know such procedures and legal formalities. He will have to be fully conscious of rules to be followed for the purpose of collecting death certificates or insurance payments.

Finally, an undertaker should know how to drive and should possess a valid driving license, as he may have to drive vehicles to transport the deceased.

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One of the truths of our being is death. All of us have to confront it and is yet not ready for it. Conducting a service in memory of the dead is one of the oldest customs that has witnessed a lot of changes. A conventional funeral service was conducted in church, with specific hymns, poems and a eulogy for the departed. However, this practice is changing these days, with more and more people wanting to go for a more personal funeral service for their near and dear one.

Carrying out a funeral service right after the death of a loved one can be an extremely difficult task for any family. One of the misconceptions surrounding funeral services is that it is compulsory under law for the family of the departed to arrange a service, but this is not true. Secondly, most people think that it has to be held in a church, which again is not the case. It is to be noted that though conventionally such services were held in a church, with the trend of personalizing, a lot of funeral services are being held within the premises of the deceased. Thirdly, such services do not mandate the presence of any clergy or pastor or even a casket for that matter.

But, keeping in line with the idea of a personal funeral service, substantial thought should be given to the preferences of the dead person. The choice of music should be from among the personal choices of the dead, though it is preferable to have soft music. You could select from a live performance or going with pre recorded music.

There is also a growing trend of exhibiting the personal things of the deceased to display his or her true nature to the entire world. Address is extremely important in all funeral services including the personal ones. It could be a poem, a song or a personal speech that aptly describes the dead person.

Finally, it is advisable to give the guests assembled at the service some type of a memento that will help them remember the departed forever.

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